Saturday, June 28, 2008

I think we may need an intervention.

I admit it, I am severely addicted. Sometimes I find myself at Trader Joe's with an "excuse" that I need________ (fill in the blank), but really, I am just there for IT. IT and some other essentials that go so well with IT. IT calls my name as I walk through the holy gates, (that, of course would be TJ's)

"Mere, there's only 3/4 of a jar left, you need some more of me!"

Yes, my fellow friends. Most of you (Jen, Ashley, HTFU et al) know EXACTLY what IT is - PEANUT BUTTER!!!!!! And I am not talking about that processed crapola that comes in industrial sized tubs at Costco. NO WAY IN HELL.....I am talking about the delicious, seductive, smooth-yet-crunchy "Organic Natural Trader Joe's Crunchy"'s pure heaven on earth......It makes me salivate just thinking about it.

I, like some others (who shall remain nameless but let's just say they are Starbucks-obsessed!!! RR, ME) am completely obsessed with the PROCESS, shall we say, that goes into a perfect jar of Trader Joe's Organic Natural Crunchy. Should you be so obsessed, please follow the rules below :
1) Buy 2 jars--in case of course, you have NO PB at home in your fridge, which would be in fact, a crisis! In that case, buy 3 at a time (You really never know what life entails but you ALWAYS need to have your trusty companion available at a moment's notice to take with you to race/weekend away/in the event you starve to death)
2) Upon your return from the store, promptly turn sealed container upside down. This will promote even distribution of natural peanut oils and will sufficiently prepare you to "STIR" later.
3) Go do something ridiculous. Paint your toenails. Make and drink a pot of coffee. Read a blog or two.
4) Return to that pretty little jar and GET WORKIN'
5) Open sealed container and with a knife, begin stirring slowly in a churning motion. Use those strong wrists. ( I add a few EXTRA shakes of Sea Salt, just to give it some more OOMPH!)
6) Lick the knife, you know you want to!
7) Toss in the fridge (I hope you screwed lid back on!!).
!Voila! You have just mastered a fine art! Congrats, pat yourself on the back, and spread some of that fine delicious-ness on a warm toasty slice of bread!!


Jennifer Harrison said...

You are too funny! I LOVE PB too, as we all know..but believe it or ALL TIME FAV is Smucker's Natural Creamy PB with honey. OH YEAH. I am actually staring at it here next to me. Eeks!
PS And I can not vote on your POLL regarding need to add one that says, "Don't drink it."
:) Hee hee
Jen H.

Rory said...

I will eat only peanut butter for breakfast. Will that be ok?

Meredith said...

Rory, I think you are catching on. Very good. Keep your focus, now. :)